Have a great Christmas! If you don’t celebrate Christmas, have a great week anyway, and see you after!
Posts Tagged ‘happiness’
Merry Christmas!
Tuesday, December 22nd, 2009Fun theory
Friday, October 16th, 2009My Facebook page showed a link to a video saying something about “fun theory.” So I watched it, and it seems a shopping center in Stockholm, Sweden remodeled a staircase to look like a piano keyboard. The staircase is positioned between the up and down escalators. It not only looks like a piano keyboard; when people walk on it, it plays!
They videotaped people using the piano key staircase—not merely walking up and down, but stopping to bounce on and “play” the steps! Compared to when the staircase was an “ordinary” staircase, two-thirds more people were choosing the piano stairs over the escalator!
Exercise, music, fun…all it took was someone’s innovative idea to add a big piece of brightness to everyone’s day.
What a wonderful world
Monday, October 12th, 2009I went to San Francisco Saturday with my family. I had not been to SF just to “hang out” (although I’ve driven through it, and once attended a seminar at a hotel near the airport) in at least 25 years. That is pretty unbelievable, considering it is only about a three-hour drive away, even with a reasonable amount of traffic.
What an experience for the senses! It would require a large amount of space to describe even a little of what there was to see, hear, smell, etc., in the short time I was there. So I’ll focus on one small area: Ghirardelli Square. Ghirardelli’s claim to fame is, of course, chocolate. But the fascinating sight was the people!
Star Wars characters were there: Luke Skywalker, Darth Vader, and some storm troopers, in absolutely convincing costumes. There was a quartet of men in jackets and ties playing instrumental music; just out of earshot of them was a younger man singing and playing guitar. Little kids finger-painted at some tables set up for the purpose. People sat around drinking coffee drinks.
And most of the people there frequently stopped what they were doing to look up and watch the Blue Angels, who were doing maneuvers overhead—sometimes very close to the surface of the water. Everyone, I’m sure, was marveling at the skill possessed by the pilots of those jets, who were using their skill for no other obvious reason than to entertain us. And it cost us nothing at all beyond whatever it cost just to get there.
The world is full of amazing “stuff.” Sometimes we forget to notice!
About our set points
Wednesday, September 30th, 2009We hear all about “set points.” We have a weight set point: the weight we naturally gravitate up or down to if and when we stop trying to change it. Marci Shimoff talks about a “happiness set point” in her book Happy for No Reason. Same idea: whether something good happens or something bad happens, we eventually settle back to our happiness set point.
Here’s another example: temperature. This morning when I went for a walk, it was 43 degrees—the coldest it had been for several months. It felt cold! Now, that sounds like actual, legitimate cold to some people. But I lived in Maine for two years, and many mornings it would be around 0 degrees Fahrenheit when I went out for a walk. Some days it would be snowing as well, and on a few days it would be windy on top of all that.
Yes, it was cold. But it was bearable. And now that I’m no longer in Maine, and I’ve just been through a long, hot Gold Country summer, 43 degrees feels cold!
So what’s the broader application here? (Yes, I like to ask that question.) It’s this: that which once seemed extreme or even completely unbelievable can become comfortable and normal. In other words, something you desire or aspire to may seem so far out of your reality that you can’t even “feel” what it would be like to have it. Health, wealth, good relationships: any of those may seem very far away right now, but that doesn’t mean they are.
I remember saying, “Ten degrees isn’t cold,” and meaning it. Imagine yourself saying “[fill in the blank with whatever it is you want] isn’t too much to ask”—and mean it.
The Mary Poppins effect, part 3
Wednesday, September 16th, 2009Here’s my third and final takeaway from Mary Poppins. As kids, we don’t always appreciate the effort that’s been put into something for our benefit. Take, for example, the talent that went into the making of this movie. Now, Mary Poppins was released in 1964; some of the animation and special effects may look “cheesy” to us, but in a way, that just makes the results more impressive.
There’s the acting. The chemistry between Mary and Bert is just palpable, is it not? As a kid, I found the different British accents of the characters both amusing and confusing. I read recently that Dick Van Dyke’s fake Cockney accent made the list of “worst movie accents ever.” Ah well; I reluctantly concede that it’s pretty bad.
But the dancing! I saw a YouTube clip of Mr. Van Dyke on the Rosie O’Donnell show where he said he didn’t start dancing until his 30s. Since he was still in his 30s when the movie was made, he had been dancing only a few years! Amazing! As a kid, I had no clue about the skill required to dance so well—all I knew was that I was being entertained.
And therein is the takeaway: we don’t always know what others are doing that benefits us. Much of the time, all we notice is whether or not we are pleased with a situation. I suggest that we will all be blessed if we pay more attention to the contributions of others.
The Mary Poppins effect, part 2
Tuesday, September 15th, 2009Another aspect of Mary Poppins that didn’t have a significant impact on me as a child—but did now—was Uncle Albert’s peculiar habit of laughing so hard he levitates up to the ceiling. Remember the scene? Mary, along with Jane, Michael, and Bert, goes to visit Uncle Albert because he’s having a particularly severe spell of…what? Jollity, merriment, the giggles? Anyway, he’s up there, telling corny jokes and laughing until he tumbles head-over-heels, just below the ceiling.
Then the others catch what he has—first the children, then Bert, and finally Mary—and they all end up having a tea party while hovering in the air.
It all reminds me of Marci Shimoff’s book Happy for No Reason. Do we really need a “reason” to laugh so hard that we float—if not literally, at least figuratively? I say no! So be happy, laugh, and infect others with your happiness.
The Mary Poppins effect, part 1
Monday, September 14th, 2009I watched Mary Poppins on DVD over the weekend. I’d seen the movie as a kid, when it was new in the theater. I can’t remember if I saw it again, perhaps on TV, in the intervening years.
When you watch a movie again as an adult, of course, you get something rather different out of it. Such was the case with Mary Poppins. As a kid, I grieved along with Jane and Michael Banks as Mary packed up to leave. “Don’t you love us, Mary Poppins?” they asked. I figured the Banks family had found their perfect nanny at last and that they’d all live happily ever after—until Jane and Michael outgrew the need for nannies, anyway. But it was not to be; she left just as everyone was getting happy. How mean! Yet she must have had her reasons, I figured, even at that age: someone as sweet and wonderful as Mary Poppins wouldn’t be mean on purpose.
Now, of course, I understand. Mary Poppins had other kids to take care of, other families to “fix.” The Bankses were forever changed; they had been a dysfunctional family with unruly kids who’d frightened off a whole string of nannies. During Mary’s brief stay, Mr. Banks learned to appreciate his kids, and the entire household was left in a better state than it was before her arrival. And this is how it is with many of the people and events in our lives—we’re happy when they come, and sad when they go, but, if we are wise, are forever changed.
Do you want it or need it?
Monday, August 3rd, 2009Do you have something on your “wish list” that seems to be evading you? Most often it’s money, health, or relationship(s) where people feel a void in their lives.
But if you’re constantly telling yourself, everyone else, God, and/or the universe that you need the thing you don’t have, you’re going to feel frustrated, fearful, and unhappy. Is that where you sometimes find yourself? Frustration, fear, and unhappiness are negative emotions that will push away, rather than pull toward you, the thing(s) you want.
So here’s what you do instead: deeply desire the thing you want, and be happy without it. This will create positive emotions and the atmosphere into which good things feel welcome.
Try it and see what happens.
Life as a terminal illness?
Wednesday, July 1st, 2009“Think of life as a terminal illness, because if you do, you will live it with joy and passion, as it ought to be lived.” –Anna Quindlen, A Short Guide to a Happy Life
I discovered this in Reader’s Digest.
What a profound idea! When you think about it, life really is a terminal illness. And that’s not a pessimistic or morbid thought; it’s a positive one. Really! From the moment of birth, we begin the process of dying, and if we “live as if we were dying” (the topic of numerous songs and books), we live each day as if it’s to be cherished.
We humans go through life carrying any number of burdens. Here’s a short list:
–chronic poor health
–abusive or neglectful parent(s)
–a physical disability
–a learning disability
–a congenital defect guaranteed to shorten our life expectancy
–financial difficulties
–an ill or disabled parent, sibling, or child
– loss of a loved one–especially under unexpected, tragic, or mysterious circumstances
–a difficult person whose goal is to make you miserable, scare you, or harm you
The rare person may go through life free of significant burdens. We can only hope that someone gifted with such an extraordinarily easy life would dedicate their life to helping others.
But is an easy life really a gift? What would a person be like, if he or she never experienced any real hardship?
Perhaps life itself is the gift. A gift isn’t necessarily something we like. Remember when you were a kid, and someone–perhaps a “shirt-tail” relative who didn’t know you well, or an older person out of touch with what kids were into–gave you a gift you hated? You probably had to thank the giver for it anyway, right?
It seems as though a life free of hardship wouldn’t be very effective for making us strong and productive people. How could anyone be thankful for an easy life if they had never known hardship? You can only be thankful for ease and comfort if you know what it’s like to suffer, I believe.
Life as a terminal illness. That works for me. Now I can live with joy and passion, because each day that I’m alive is something to be thankful for.